The waiting is killing me
I've found that the job of being a writer consists of 10% writing and 90% waiting. You write the book and feel an immense sense of pride and accomplishment. After all you set out to write a novel, and you finished it. Celebrate... now calm down because while you thought writing the book was the hard part you haven't begun to start the hard part yet. The hard part begins when you start writing your query letter. After writing the query letter... rewrite that bitch cause your first one sucks.
Okay, have you rewritten your letter? Good... rewrite it, it still sucks.
Finished that one? Have a drink or five... now rewrite it, this one is better but still... yeah it sucks.
Rinse and repeat until you have a perfect query letter... now repeat it one more time.
Success, you just wrote the best query letter ever. Now look for agents, get a list. Go for your top five... now add another five... and another... maybe another. Send them your letter... but just the first five... why just the first five? That's easy.
You only send to the first five because guess what? Yup, your query still sucks. You won't know that at first though. You'll find that out after waiting weeks, maybe months for the rejections to come in.
Now lets get some help, there are oodles of websites out there that will help you write a query letter and give you advice and even a lot of forums where you can post your letter and get help from other people. So now you will definitely have the best query letter that has ever graced the inbox of any agent ever in the history of everything So send that bad boy out... but only to the next five.
Guess what... yup still not right. Now is a good time to consider giving up and maybe putting things aside for a little while... or it's time to redouble your efforts. I vote redouble.
Alright so you're going through this process now, you've considered giving up multiple times, and you have decided that maybe you should actually try to meet some agents and editors so you make the logical choice and go to a conference.
You wow them, they love your idea and think you are the bee's knees, the wasp's nipples, the roach's unmentionables, and they want to see your work but they also want a synopsis. Guess what. Yeah that starts a repeat of the query process.
Skip ahead, you have the query, you have the synopsis, and you have the book. You send it to those editors and agents that wanted to see it and.... you wait. Days feel like weeks, weeks feel like months... months feel like millenia.
The thing is you've been through this wait every time you've sent out a query, and it still kills. You don't have a Police Box handy so you can't just skip forward in time, deal with a few Daleks, and return to that blessed day when they want to see your full novel and you wait some more, or even better deal with some Weeping Angels and get back in time to see that you have an agent... nope, you are no Time Lord so you must wait like all of us other mere humans.
That's where I'm at now. Yes I keep busy with my day job, yes my wife and I are battling breast cancer... rather she's battling the cancer and I'm her support... her companion if you will... don't tell her that though cause she'll think of herself as the doctor.
Still the time creeps by and I just want to hear back from the wonderful people that asked to see my work. In the meantime my imagination runs wild. I think of everything from soul crushing rejections in which they tell me that I managed to come up with the absolute worst combination of words any ever dared put into a string and call a book. To excited acceptances telling me they are sure I can have a multi-book deal worth millions of dollars before we ever get to movie rights... usually I'm somewhere in between and leaning towards polite rejection with maybe a compliment or two thrown in just to avoid totally crushing me.
In the meantime my imagination runs wild and I dream of a home on the beach with a writing room decorated in a nautical steampunk theme, where I can open a window and listen to the waves as I write my next best seller. Then I go on book tours and meet adoring fans that are too numerous to count and everyone loves me and I get home so my wife and I can go to our vacation house for a few weeks. We go to a city that we both love and vacation in a small apartment/condo close to my favorite pub and coffee shop so I can walk to each and people watch and be anonymous while gearing up for my next journey into the realm that my ideas come from.
Instead... I'm waiting. I come home from work everyday and check my email hoping for word, hoping that someone considers me the bee's knees... maybe the wasp's nipple's... I'd settle for the snail's toenails at this point.
Hmm... this turned into a bit more of a ramble than I intended... sorry about that.